Jaslyn Singh: Ladies, figure out what you like first

Jaslyn Singh
For Sun-Times Media
July 9 11:27 a.m.

Women seemingly are giving up their lives and passions for their boyfriends or husbands.

A few of my clients from the past reported that they seem to give up their own interests just to keep their partners in their lives, fearing they will leave them for someone else.

Ladies, if your man leaves you for someone else, then the relationship was not worth it to begin with.

First thing is key. Love yourself first before having an expectation of others to love you.

And Second, please try to develop your own passions and interests versus changing your interests just to appease your partner.

Remember, the movie, “27 dresses” where the sister falls in love with the boss and says she is a vegan just to impress? In actuality she loved eating hamburgers. It’s simple! Keep it real!

Be yourself, and if you’re struggling and you don’t know who you are and if you don’t have passions of your own, then get some support and talk it out. Talking is great therapy … you might have an epiphany of your own.

If you have given up your career or your self worth just to please someone else, then it is a choice you made. You need to take the time and check yourself. Explore your inner need to change and people please others.

Explore your childhood especially and process if you have ever struggled with issues of abandonment by your mother or father. Things connect. You can connect the dots if you take the time to.

Just because your man loves something, doesn’t mean you have to, too. You can respect each others’ passions and meet half way, but you don’t have to change just because you’re afraid of getting dumped.

Love yourself first. Good luck!

Contact Jaslyn Singh, licensed clinical professional counselor in Naperville, at 630-913-0080 or visit www.jaslynsingh.com.

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